Dear Cheater:
We all know that it's frustrating to get rejected from the lottery for a big race. And it's no fun to have to pay so much for a race like the NYC Marathon, even if you're in the employ of a large investment banking firm (like - oh i dunno - maybe Merrill Lynch for instance.) I'm impressed that you're such a crafty fella and have found a nice way around these little annoyances by printing your own number. Apparently if you're handy with Photoshop, anyone can run the marathon for free.
Here's a tip. If you plan on using this method in the future - don't print your first name on your race shirt. Especially if it's an uncommon name. Obsessed bandit catchers with limited social lives but seemingly endless energy when it comes to finding cheaters (a/k/a me) will spend as long as it takes to find your full name and then go through all your old results. Upon doing so they'll notice that even when you do get into a race (like the NYC Half) legitimately, you do your magic for a friend so that she too can run the race and accept a finisher's medal for running a sold out race for free.
One other possible means of escaping detection in the future. Try to pick a 5-digit number that doesn't sound like you're on Sesame Street. After all, as an Ivy League grad, I'd expect that you could do better.
Respectfully,
Jonathan
P.S. I suspect that once NYRR has their way with you, you'll be walking kinda funny. Maybe i'll post some links to photos of your glory days for old times' sake.
Justice Is Blind. And Dumb As a Box of Rocks.
Posted at 03:08 PM in Coach's Comments | Permalink | Comments (3) | TrackBack (0)